If you've ever handed your child a carefully chosen gift, only to hear, “Is that all?” you’re not alone. As parents, we’ve all had moments when our kids seem more focused on what they’re getting than on the love or effort behind it. It’s easy to feel discouraged, especially in a culture where advertising and peer pressure scream that more is better, and "enough" is never enough.
But here's the good news: gratitude is learned. And as Christian parents, we have the unique opportunity to teach our children that thankfulness isn’t just about the gifts—it’s about recognizing the heart of the giver and the provision of a loving God who supplies all our needs.
Sometimes "Gimmies" are more natural than gratitude
I’ll never forget one Christmas morning when our boys were younger. We’d spent weeks trying to make it magical—choosing meaningful gifts and setting the perfect scene. But as the wrapping paper flew, one of our sons barely glanced at his new toy before asking, “What’s next?”
In that moment, David and I exchanged a knowing look. We realized we’d been so focused on giving that we hadn’t taught them how to receive. That day, we started rethinking how we could model and nurture authentic gratitude in our family—shifting the focus from the things to the relationships that matter most. And we recognized that gratitude is cultivated by daily rhythms and habits, not just once a year.
Why Gratitude Matters
Gratitude isn’t just a nice habit or polite manners; it’s a spiritual practice. In 1 Thessalonians 5:18, Paul writes, “Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” Gratitude helps us see beyond what we have to Who provides for us—our heavenly Father, whose love never fails.
From a neuroscience perspective, gratitude changes our brains. It increases serotonin and dopamine, the chemicals that help us feel joy and contentment. It also strengthens relationships, helping us focus on connection rather than consumption.
But in a world that constantly pushes our kids to want more, gratitude has to be taught.
5 Gratitude Rituals for Families
To help your family cultivate thankfulness, try weaving these simple habits into your daily life:
"Thank you for Thinking of Me" Practice
When your child receives a gift, shift the focus to the giver by pointing out the thoughtfulness behind it. For example, “Grandma remembered how much you love art supplies. Isn’t it kind that she thought of you while shopping?” This encourages your child to see gifts as an expression of love rather than just objects to enjoy.
When your child receives a gift, shift the focus to the giver by pointing out the thoughtfulness behind it. For example, “Grandma remembered how much you love art supplies. Isn’t it kind that she thought of you while shopping?” This encourages your child to see gifts as an expression of love rather than just objects to enjoy.
Highs, Lows, and Thanks at Dinner
During family meals, take turns sharing one high point from the day, one challenge, and something you’re thankful for. This simple ritual teaches children to notice God’s provision in both joys and struggles, while also fostering meaningful connection.
During family meals, take turns sharing one high point from the day, one challenge, and something you’re thankful for. This simple ritual teaches children to notice God’s provision in both joys and struggles, while also fostering meaningful connection.
Gratitude Letters
Once a month, have your children write (or dictate) a letter to someone who has blessed them. Encourage them to include specifics about what they’re grateful for and how that person has impacted their life. This practice nurtures relational gratitude and helps kids focus on the people, not just the gifts.
Once a month, have your children write (or dictate) a letter to someone who has blessed them. Encourage them to include specifics about what they’re grateful for and how that person has impacted their life. This practice nurtures relational gratitude and helps kids focus on the people, not just the gifts.
Gratitude Jar
Keep a jar in your home where family members can drop in notes of thanks throughout the week. On Sundays, open the jar and read the notes together, celebrating God’s goodness and the kindness of others.
Keep a jar in your home where family members can drop in notes of thanks throughout the week. On Sundays, open the jar and read the notes together, celebrating God’s goodness and the kindness of others.
Praise Walks
Take a family walk and intentionally notice the beauty of creation, thanking God for specific blessings. Encourage your children to look for small gifts—a cool breeze, a blooming flower, or a kind neighbor waving hello. This habit trains your family to recognize God’s provision in the everyday.
Take a family walk and intentionally notice the beauty of creation, thanking God for specific blessings. Encourage your children to look for small gifts—a cool breeze, a blooming flower, or a kind neighbor waving hello. This habit trains your family to recognize God’s provision in the everyday.
Shifting the Focus
As parents, we set the tone for gratitude in our homes. When we model thankfulness—for small acts of kindness, for each other’s efforts, and for God’s provision—our children will follow. Gratitude isn’t about perfection - always saying "thank you" - ; it’s about perspective - recognizing the heart and relationship behind the gift.
Let’s teach our kids that what they have isn’t who they are, and that a grateful heart leads to a joyful life. In doing so, we’ll help them navigate a consumer-driven world with contentment and faith, keeping their eyes on the ultimate Giver of every good gift.
Which of these rituals will you try with your family this week? Share your thoughts or ideas in the comments—We'd love to hear how you’re cultivating gratitude in your home!
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